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Friday, April 19, 2024
HomeNewsArchivesREALITY OF WHO WANTS A CFO IS NO DREAM

REALITY OF WHO WANTS A CFO IS NO DREAM

Dear Source,
I had a really wild dream last night which I'd like to share with your readers. In my dream, our delegate did not come up with the idea of a CFO. No, no, no. In a rather transparent deal, she was given an ultimatum by the United States Congress. See, the feds are the only ones who listen to our complaints, since we seem to have zero luck on the local level. The voters are extremely unhappy with our elected and appointed officials, and constantly nag the feds for help.
Here is where it gets really political. Duh. If our delegate refuses, the feds will step in. This is not because the feds are interested in colonialism any more than we are, but because they have a vested interested in the territory. The word "colonialism" has become 'way too overworked. We sold our souls (think of it as an "A-rated bond issue"), so we have no reason to gripe. Oh, many will say, "I didn't do it; I wasn't even alive when that took place. It was my ancestors who sold us out." Well, that's another line that has been used too often.
Seems the feds gave the honorary delegate an out. She can either propose the creation of a CFO position (and they even provided us the option of choosing from our local gene pool), or she is out of a job. For job-security purposes and to save face, our delegate has to abide by this federal diplomatic decision. She knows it will be unpopular with her constituents, but she doesn't have much of a choice.
The Organic Act, another concession, has given us ample rope to hang ourselves. We're doing a pretty good job of that. I awoke in a feverish sweat, screaming. When I realized that it had only been a dream, I went back to sleep to a much more pleasant vision of the shower scene in "Psycho."
Dory Tiblier
St. Croix

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