Dear Coach Paradise,
I am a divorced woman in my early 60s who works in retail. I do not have much of a retirement account, and my social security will be small. I know that I will need to keep working and earning money into the foreseeable future. I love to write and have written articles for a local paper in the past. I am also a good photographer. I would love to write and take photographs and make money doing it, but whenever I say this to myself the voice in my head goes, "Yeah right. Dream on, honey." I know it is a pipe dream, but it keeps coming back. I cant afford to quit my job, but working five full days a week leaves me too exhausted to focus on writing or photography. Do I just grit my teeth and consider myself lucky to have a job that pays fairly well and give up on the dream? Or what? Please let me know if you think I could have a chance to make a living doing what I love.
A dreamer
Dear Dreamer,
Do realize how very lucky you are to have not only one but two passions that keep you up at night (and maybe more)? Many people spend their lives searching for a creative outlet in vain. How to earn a living doing what we love so we never have to work again? You can either stop here and listen to your "monkey mind" saying discouraging things to deter you from even trying, or you can throw the monkey a banana and start focusing on your goal. When I say focusing, I mean getting really clear about whom you would like to be and what you would like to be doing. Picture yourself actually doing it. Create what I will call an ideal scene. Try it on, walk around in it, see how it feels, revel in it, write it down and maybe even create a "dream board" or "treasure map" of how it all looks. Dont let worrying about the how stop you.
I know, I know — I didnt address the money thing. Considering that you dont have a big stash of money to tide you over, I would suggest that you keep your day job. Perhaps there is some way to work less or create a space that you could call "a room of my own." This might be 15 minutes before or after work just so you can hold your head up when you say you are a writer. Even if you dont have much time to devote to your passions, you can certainly use what little time you have to start taking small, sweet steps toward your goal NOW. I think you will be very surprised at what beginning in a small way may lead to — not only in terms of producing writing, but also in terms of ideas, inspiration, and unexpected opportunities. Whatever you focus on gets bigger, so focus on what you want rather than on what you dont want.
Remember, you dont have to know how it is all going to work out. You do, however, have to allow yourself to dream with abandon and get into deliberately creating the reality you want to live in these dreams. Find people to support you and root for you. Create affirmations that reinforce how creative you are, how ingenious, how you can pull time out of a hat. Dont take no for an answer. If I can picture you as a successful, happy writer-photographer without a money care in the world, you can certainly humor me and get going. Keep me posted.
To your outrageous success,
Coach Paradise.
Editor's note: Coach Paradise (AKA Anne Nayer), Professional Life Coach, is a member of the International Coaching Federation, an MSW clinical social worker-psychotherapist and a medical case manager with 30 years experience working with people of all shapes, sizes and challenges.
For further information about her services, call 774-4355 or email her.
