Jan. 4, 2003 – The Farrelly Brothers — whose previous comedic endeavors have featured fat people, "Shallow Hal;" schizophrenics, "Me, Myself and Irene;" stupidity, "Dumb and Dumber;" and a unique condition, one-handed bowlers, in "Kingpin" — take on the humorous aspects of Siamese, or conjoined, twins in the adroitly titled, "Stuck on You."
Critic Roger Ebert takes a kindly view of the brothers' choice of material: "Their approach to handicaps is open and natural, and refreshing, compared to the anguished, guilt-laden treatment usually given to handicapped characters in movies. The fact that Walt hopes to be a movie star is less amazing, really, than that the Farrellys had the nerve to make a comedy about it."
Walt (Greg Kinnear) is literally joined at the hip to Bo (Matt Damon), which works out just fine, or as fine as it can under the circumstances, in their little diner in Cape Cod where they sling out a burger in three minutes "or your money back," until Walt's acting urge must take flight. Bo would happily stay put, but, obviously, cannot.
Off they head to Tinseltown and no end of adventures. Somehow, they get tangled up with Cher, who is trying to worm her way out of an upcoming sitcom of which she wants no part. She sees the brothers as her answer. Surely, it will flop. However, á la the story of "The Producers" and the success of their play "Springtime for Hitler," Cher's sitcom becomes a howling success when the audience accidentally discovers Bo hiding behind some scenery while Walt emotes with Cher. The ratings, as they say, soar. People love the twins.
There's plenty of other talent running around loose, too, with shots of Jack Nicholson, Jay Leno and Meryl Streep playing themselves. Leno interviews the twins simultaneously, Nicholson is Nicholson, and whatever Streep does is described by Ebert as "the very definition of a good sport."
There are others of note in the movie, too. The brothers' unlikely agent Morty (Seymour Cassel) lives in a retirement home, uses a scooter to get around, but still chain-smokes cigars and considers himself a full-service agent.
Then there is the brunette who behaves like a blonde, April, (Eva Mendes). Upon seeing the flesh joining the brothers, she asks, "So – where'd you get this done?"
The movie is written by Charles B. Wessler, Bennett Yellin, Peter Farrelly and Bobby Farrelly. It's two minutes short of two hours, and is rated PG-13 for crude and sexual humor and some language. Whatever that means.
It is playing at Market Square East on St. Thomas.

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